Tuesday, July 30, 2013

What NOT to Say to Your Wife About Her New Running Shoes!

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If you are new here, this perhaps is maybe not the best day for you to stop by, I usually write about family fun and all things fabulous with kids and moms.  However, today we shall be discussing Marriage:  Fun or Not?

So, I have been reading several highly recommended Christian guide books: You know the type...how to have the perfect marriage and a how to change your marriage books...blah blah blah  and I must say - "BLECH!"  I honestly feel like the women writing these are actually in the 50s?  It is just doesn't seem to pertain to real life and a real marriage. Perhaps, I don't have a "real-life" marriage?  It feels like that some weeks days.  I simply do not wear heels and pearls whilst cleaning our potty.  By those standards I would probably definitely be considered a slob.  

Lovely husband and I talked about the "advice" in the so called guides.  All went well, which is just to say that his eyes glazed over until we/I were done talking and he could go outside and "do something". (Hm, sounds vaguely familiar) 

Daughter and I going out for a run in our new "clown shoes" ;D

Earlier in the week:  I had gotten a pair of a most coveted pair of amazing barefoot running shoes with a giftcard (had it been cash, I would have done the mom thing and spent it on the kids).  I hadn't worn them yet and had mentioned to lovely husband that  "I couldn't have designed a cooler pair of shoes" and "Oh, they are so me!" and "I can't wait to show you".
So, Saturday morning, with great anticipation.  I put the fabulous new shoes on my feet.  I did a screech of excitement.  I wave wildy to lovely husband outside working in the yard to come to the door, that he simply MUST come and SEE my new shoes!  I run over to door.  I wait. He sees them. I beam with anticipation.  He looks up.  And without missing a beat, says "Oh, they look like clown shoes" matter-a-factly, then continues to play with the little one outside.   

Curious.  I immediately ran to check the trusty guide books of perfect marriages for references but there were no reference in the index for clowns or even shoes!  Are you kidding me?

No clown commenting guide?  Really?  I feel sure this should have been covered somewhere in the "would you like to sleep on the couch tonight, honey? " section. 

So, by evening time, after letting the words creep into my head all morning, I was a big ball of goo.  Conjure up this lovely image, if you will:  sobbing, mascara running down my face (now I really looked like a clown) wearing very expensive (but, oh so comfy) running shoes, silently swearing and glaring at the "all knowing" marriage book, sweeping organic cereal off the floor with a 2-foot broken broom (story for another day),  looking like a  (insert  FFFFavorite___ swear word here) CLOWN!

I hope you have enjoyed my weekend adventure; stay tuned for next week's post on "How cold is too cold for your husband to sleep in the garage?".  Enjoy your week, Lovelies.

Please also look for my new marriage book coming out, titled:  How to be the clown of your husband's dream!  Pre-order at your local circus Amazon.

And, look for my upcoming Pinterest debut for:  "Calling your new favorite shoes Clown Shoes was a compliment."  - Said no one. Ever.

 Yes, I love these shoes and yes, I highly recommend.  Also, I really have nothing against clowns, I just do not want to look like one...not that there is anything wrong with that.

1 comment:

Hanna said...

Hi there, I'm Hanna! I'm co-hosting the Aloha Friday hop this week and just wanted to stop by, say hi and follow your blog :)

http://www.violetlulu.blogspot.com